Saturday, October 2, 2010

Once

The possibility of things happening twice
is null.
Unless you are Lazarus.
Life, Love, Death
happens once.
And this seagull that is flying by
is forever gone for you.
The only thing that repeats
is the green grass
and the cry into the Blue.

Anxiety

Worrisome, drunken dreams.
Lips twitch.
The full yellow moon
dips into the cloud only
to slide back up like a pendulum.
My cat howls at the moon.
And my dead dog meows.
While I float in an
oriental swamp
somewhere in Laos.

Holy Day

The glossy eyes of the sheep.
No.
Not the sheep.
It's head.
Dead..
On the platter.
All around men rejoice
About who loves God more.
God shuts the door.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Song of Unrequited Love Played to Arabic Music

A long time passed
and he didn't come back.
Today and tomorrow...
today and tomorrow...
I was so full of pain
i could cry for one hundred years...
day after day
he was deaf
his ears
would hear only things
that he liked.
And he would walk the ground
like a blind preacher
who doubts his step and belief.
As I grieved
he would write: SMILE
and to my sorrow
he said: YOU'RE ATTRACTIVE.
He made holes in my heart
the size of large coins
and my mind became a desert.
I couldn't reawaken his soul.
He never said the word LOVE --
only LIKE.
And I thought: what a waste
What a greedy heart
with no use!
It needs to die!
And I KILLED him.
That's the truth.
I do not lie.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

The Primitive Song of Life

Life, aoulidi, is strange
the day goes by
and another comes.
Today and tomorrow.
Today and tomorrow.
It's not the pain or sorrow
but nothing and time
and we wait it out.
Because what else is there?
And when doubt
crawls like shaitan-snake
and says: WHAT IF?
we pick up the fat kif
and inhale.
And then life disappears...
sweet, short and whole
this life of ours
so full of holes.

Life, adoni, is strange
and it can get long.
The Lord does as he pleases
and the Lord knows best.
I just sit here like the rest
and sing one-worded song
monotonous, like the life of a dog.
Today and tomorrow.
Today and tomorrow.
And the smoke of kif
caresses my sorrow.

Eastern Song of Childhood

On my childhood street
there was dust and stones.
It was long, crooked, narrow.
Dogs and cats walked their bones
They looked from behind like an arrow.
Acacia trees were in bloom
and skinny boys squatted and smoked,
getting high.
For hours on end I looked up from my window
into the sky.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Brooklyn Ballad

for Vadim K.


You were shooting it up on Avenue Z
and blood would squirt.
Outside sparrows and gulls
pecked the dirt.

Their light and faithful hearts
tore off from the street.
While yours --red and heavy melt into mud
or slowed into sleet.

In your worn-out armchair --
pale and thin
you listened to Joplin.
Lokiing half way beetween fallen god
or a goblin.

Demons squeezed into your veins
hissing of love.
Possessed -- you spoke of crime and Cain
like the young Kirilov.*

Your ashes roam on Sheepshead Bay
above the waters.
Sparrows and gulls live day to day.
They never faulter.


* Kirilov -- character from Doestoevsky's novel The Possessed

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Love

it was in the dark room
empty and dark.
that my heart stood erect
and immobile like a stork.
and as i held myself to be immune
to love. it came upon me
like the summer storm.
i remember the day we met in may
but i never thought
that what god giveth
he then takes away.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

A statue with no hands of feet
A torso in the air
So, what's the use of all this meat
If love came by so rarely?

Friday, January 29, 2010

Monologue of Death

Your colorless eyes
Your pitchless voice
Your daily crimes
Your nightly losses
Your dark red pain
Your light blue dreams
Your razor-sharp brain
And all of your screams
Your selfish love
Your useless lust
Your life that's pouring
down all the drains fast
Like the blood of a suicide
in a gray, cold tub.
Your thoughts -- are a dismemebered
body of a caught seacrab.
Give it all to me
Give it all to the bone.
I am here to say
That you are not too alone
Raise your head
Look into the night
In its worn-out canvass
See the line of light
I have weathered you out
And I tested your soul
You were immune to doubt
But i did leave a hole
As big as this world
in your little torn heart
You can go now you're free
There will be no more hurt.

Despair

Despair

Mother, I've lost my mind.
Father, I've shot my brain.
Brother, my eyes are blind.
Sister, is your name Cain?

Someone! I dream of steppes.
Open and white with snow.
Noone! with every step
Clearer is the vulgar NO!

Hey! Almighty! Pour me a drink!
and make it strong and bitter!
Watch me gulp it without winking,
And then collect me like litter.

America

This country pisses on words
From skyscrapers of steel
Treats them like worn-out whores
without johns to deal with.

Wear the mask of an old cunt
indifferent, loose and raw
If you think of coming here: DONT!
unless you discard the word: AWE

Lose redemption and learn to clench
your essence, your scream in a fist.
Or else: run out into the street
and blow your brains in the morning mist.